Three Surrogacy Myths, Busted
For all of the progress that third-party reproduction has made in recent years, myths about gestational surrogacy continue to exist. Unfortunately, many misconceptions about surrogacy, surrogates, and intended parents are perpetuated by films and TV shows, which are typically more interested in making a story entertaining than realistic.
Like bad rumors, these myths can be passed from person to person, as people who are not familiar with surrogacy firsthand casually make comments that are simply not true. Even those who have the best of intentions can still sometimes get the facts about surrogacy wrong. While many of these misunderstandings aren’t rooted in malice, they can be insensitive at best and deeply hurtful at worst to surrogates as well as the individuals and couples who need the help of a surrogate.
Bridging the gap between surrogacy fact and fiction is like tending a garden. You must clear out the weeds of misunderstanding so that you can sow seeds of reality. We will explore the most common surrogacy myths to allow accurate information to prevail.
Surrogacy Myth #1: Surrogates are the biological mothers of the babies they carry.
Reality: In gestational surrogacy, which is the most common type of surrogacy arrangement in the United States, surrogates become pregnant through in vitro fertilization {IVF}. Eggs and sperm are collected from the intended parents (or donors) and combined by the embryologist to create the embryo. Once an embryo develops, it is transferred into the uterus of the surrogate. The baby’s DNA comes entirely from the egg and sperm.
Surrogacy Myth #2: Surrogates only do it for the money.
Reality: Perhaps one of the most damaging myths about surrogacy, the idea that someone would become a surrogate only because of compensation, is wholly unfair and inaccurate. While it’s true surrogates are compensated for their role in the process, surrogacy requires a degree of time, effort, and commitment that only comes from a place of giving and compassion.
Surrogacy Myth #3: Having a baby through surrogacy means that you won’t bond with your newborn.
Reality: It’s a common misconception that babies born via surrogacy primarily bond with the surrogate who carries them. While it’s true that carrying a child is a powerful experience, being close physically is not the only way to build a relationship. Intended parents start to bond with the baby from the beginning of pregnancy through ultrasound images, hearing the heartbeat, contact with the surrogate and preparing for the baby’s arrival. Once the baby is born the bonding process deepens and grows. The most important part of the parent-child relationship is love.
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Changing the perception of surrogacy is a twofold process that involves deconstructing myths and replacing them with facts. Surrogacy is a beautiful form of assisted reproduction that helps people from all backgrounds create the loving families that they deserve. If you want to learn more about surrogacy, either as an intended parent or aspiring surrogate, but don’t know much about the process, we’ll be happy to help. To learn more, contact West Coast Surrogacy today.
